When our children are starting to grow mature physically and mentally, we often think that we have got it all figured out. We became over familiarised with their attitude and ways, and we might be missing out something that affects their lives significantly without even noticing it.
Sometimes we totally do what we thought is “okay” or “simple” but, in fact, these things irrevocably ruin our children’s lives and, even if we don’t have the slightest intent to do so. Here are 3 of them:
- Giving them funny “nicknames.”
Nicknames like “Davie”, “Marty”, or “Lukesome” will eventually become annoying when they have come of age. It will cause for them to be ridiculed by their peers, yes, just by simply calling them in a strange little way can actually result in some serious problems like bullying. We can be forgiven for as long as we are calling them these names until such time that they want us to call them that way. However, at the first sign of resistance, it’s better to halt it stop.
- Reminding them to be themselves
This particular point may come off misleading for some, but it might be something that parents need to take a serious pause with and think. We cannot have our children escape peer pressures that’s all part of growing up, sometimes we misuse reminders like “be yourself”, and “you don’t need anybody, because you have your family”. Well, in fact, they also need someone else to turn to from outside their homes, in simple terms they need to socialize. Trying to set them apart in an overly protective manner can make them socially aloof—no friends! If we will trust our children and have confidence in how we raise them, then there’s no need to doubt or fear that they will do undesirable things. Remember that if values were inculcated properly they would carry it along with them no matter how high the pressures were from the outside society.
- Starting sending children to school “too” early
Again, this may have been a piece of advice that is way too off from our principles but there are simple reasons why it is not advisable to send children to school too early. We think that they will develop and or discover their skills more advanced than other children do, but the truth is we are just placing “pressure” on them by showing that they are expected of accomplishing something at their age. Instead of raising a genius, the result may be otherwise because they will already lose their interest in studying and might end up looking for something else to do, just to satisfy their desires and fight all the way through their boredom. Let them study when they are ready or if they already show eagerness to do so, in that way learning will be more effective.
It is a given fact that we all want what’s best for our children, however, we also have to keep in mind that there are some ways that are not right, no matter how good the intentions were. As we all know, a right thing that was done in a wrong way is still the wrong thing, it is also applicable in our ways of parenting.