As much as possible we want to give everything to our children, maybe it material things, needs or even their wants. However, sometimes we tend to have a thin line between giving reasonable favors and spoiling. We need to determine these red flags in order to keep our child disciplined. Thus, there are also ways to make them feel that they are not deprive or restricted to enjoy life. Here are a few tips to become a cool but not a spoiler type of parents.
The Concept of Reward and Praises.
It is very common for us, parents to give rewards or praises whenever our children have an achievement or does something good. There’s nothing wrong in doing that however you have to make sure that you are doing it the right way. Sometimes you should accompany giving rewards in teaching them the sense of responsibility. For example, asking them to sort out their toys and giving them a sweet little treat in return. But you have to make them understand the purpose of that, and even without a reward they should have the initiative to do those things. You have to make them feel appreciated with words of “sincere” praises not just a mechanical type of praise. Your children also want to please their parents in any way, especially the small ones, they have a competitive spirit in nature. Therefore even without a material reward they would love to do good gestures for you.
Be in your Children’s Level Whenever Needed.
Act like a child, play and be “silly” around our kids they love that but do it in a way that they won’t lose their respect towards you. You have to set their minds that they should not go overboard. Sometimes when kids got overwhelmed they tend to forgot who you are during playtime and instead they overlooked you as one of their playmates. You know that kids could be violent at times especially when their playmates does better than they are in their “make-up” games. They may also adapt that even if it’s you that they are playing with. Don’t let that happen because that might also provoke you to get angry with them. Always set rules and give them that impression that you are still their parents that they should follow no matter what. In that way, you are teaching them proper discipline and how they should deal even with the other adults.
The Act of Bribing.
For as simple as giving them a piece of candy to pacify their crying could already be considered as an act of bribing. You should let them know most of the time that they will not get everything they want especially if they don’t need it. That’s also a good training for them, especially when they grow up and they no longer have to depend on you. As early as possible they should already know how to become independent. Let them know that you can favor them once or twice at most, but not all the time even if they will show a transformation in their moods. It will benefit them later on, they would have clearer paths and goals and will also know how to decide rightfully for themselves. They would have firm principles in life and will likely to succeed in the future.
We should know how to bring balance and weight things. As we all know everything that is excessive could be harmful. They may seem easy but sure they will be too challenging to practice, but sooner or later you’ll get the hang of it and will be just as natural as any other habit.